facebook hate mail

so last night i came home after being in bergen most of the day with friends...as per usual i hop on my computer to go through my routine of checking emails etc...so i check my gmail and i received an email notification that someone had sent me a message on facebook...i proceed to facebook to read said message and lo and behold...it was facebook hate mail...

from: Al Zachrison
subject: oh I remember you
"you were in my elementry school class at John Marshall ha! you thought you were smart and all that well well I see that you went to Rutgers which is a 3rd class university and I went to a much better college then you did loser"

after reading the message i wasn't quite sure how to react...a part of me was slightly offended but soon i just felt kinda creeped out...i thought this might be some random idiot sending out bogus messages, but then again he knew my elementary school...ironically i had all my john marshall yearbooks right next to my computer seeing as how i had just cleaned out my desk the previous week...so i flipped through all my yearbooks looking for this dude and there was nothing...no pictures for grades 2-5...i thought long and hard but this name was not familiar, and i pride myself in my good memory...

so then i started thinking how this dude was obviously somehow affected by me...back in elementary school i dont even remember people being classified as dumb and smart..."you thought you were smart and all that"...i highly doubt it...back in those days classes were cake (maybe not for you Al) and all i wanted to do was run out with a brand new tennis ball and play wallball or rush home to play nintendo...this kid must have had major confidence/esteem issues...maybe he choked in class...maybe i answered a question that he couldn't and it fueled his toddler mind with rage and jealousy...so this kid, whom i assume is now 23 like the rest of us, must have searched for me just to send me that message...13+ years later...i find this terribly pathetic...

i mean maybe this Al Zachrison wanted me to feel offended...since i "thought" i was smart and "all that" only to end up at Rutgers while he went to a "much better college"...well im sorry Al but i dont really feel anything...your 13+ years of brooding, preparing for your ultimate revenge in the form of a facebook hate message has been foiled...and one tip to you my friend...if you insist on sending a message to insult me of my intelligence, please make sure to use spellcheck...its spelled "elementary"...good thing you went to a "much better college"...BOOYA...

ok folks so it seems ive been somewhat of a hypocrite...urging everyone to update more and then never doing so myself...as mentioned in my previous entry im pretty sure none of us do much...apart from working/sleeping and the occasional drunken-mess-of-a-nights...work is work...which basically translates to "oh my god if i dont get out of this cube ranch im going to 'fly' out the nearest window"...the rest of this entry will be verbal diarrhea, a steaming pile of random thoughts...FUN!

1. work would be so much more interesting if more ppl were down to screw around...im talking 4th grade level immaturity (in my case senior yr college immaturity ha)...sometimes im walking through the hallways and i have the sudden urge to jump into a conference room and disrupt the current meeting by screaming "waaaaaaaaaaaaaasssss uppppppp"...or when im turning a corner i feel like hiding until someone is close and then jumping out yelling gibberish scaring the crap out of them...much like the "popozao game" us residents of nichols 33 invented...or my personal favorite, when im in the bathroom and i notice someone in a stall...i feel like kicking the stall with all my might and then running out of the bathroom giggling...come on folks we all know thats some funny shit...pun intended haha...

2. i let my sister sync her ipod on my computer...let's just say although she is my older sister, her taste in music reflects otherwise...so she spends a day ripping her existing CD collection on to my machine etc...monday morning im on a train and then nsync - "tearin up my heart" starts blasting...i typically sync my whole music library on to my ipod and i never really checked what type of music she put on my computer...she put all this mid 90s pop and boy band shizzo on...i mean ppl can hate all they want but i dare ppl not to bop their head to "tearin up my heart" hahaha...i just need to make sure that i cover my ipod screen so no one can see that gay ass album cover that is displayed when the song comes on...

3. at work my friends and i spend most of our time thinking of get rich quick schemes or inventions that could make us rich and enable us to never to have to work again...our ideas range from an undershirt vest (worst idea ever haha) to swivel head rests enabling more comfortable sleeping in cars (i'm riiiiiiich biatch!!!)...one of our better ideas was for themed therapeutic paintball arenas...fed up with work? want to go john mcclane on your boss and coworkers? we would build paintball arenas to look like 1. classrooms/lecture halls  or 2. office cubicle floors and supply actors to look and act like that one mofo you just want to shoot the shit out of...the result? ppl relieve stress and no one ends up on the nightly news...this all for a reasonable price ho ho ho...

4. what is the dillio with bathrooms at work?! this is morgan freaking stanley!!! follow the damn guidelines:
          - if you bring a paper or printout into a stall, clean that ish up!!!
          - if you piss all over the goddamn seat clean it up fool!!!
          - flush, FLUSH, FLUSH!!!

5. this is the best candid shot ever...some of my best friends in vegas...alvin needs to stop checking out my diesel arms haha...

there you have it folks...a piercing look into my mind...now go update your pages so i have something to read while pretending to be productive at work...

i wish people would update their xangas more...let's be honest folks, most of us don't too much...we all work, come home and then do nothing...let's share those moments with the rest of the xanga community ha...

first off congratulations to any/all of my friends who graduated this year...to be honest i dont even know who did...jane, julie, zee?  welcome to the rest of your life...take a deep breath because its all downhill from here...zee, you're entering corporate america with the rest of us business drones...make good use of that signing bonus and buy a 360 and play gears of war with us!!! haha...

on another note...i reached a lifetime milestone...a new car!!! all with my own hard earned money...no help from anyone except for insurance info...i didnt buy the car, i decided leasing would be the better option for me...id only drive it on the weekends and after the lease is up, i want to buy something real nice...bmw? *ahem* elaine *ahem* haha...so i got a 2007 Honda Civic EX Coupe w/navigation...im proud of myself ...

*** aerhe: feel free to take my dog running...she needs it since she's been getting fat haha...i'm too lazy to drive her to new brunswick...i live off metlars lane right by busch...you can come pick her up...she's real nice and loves everyone except my dad for some reason...

see? she's dying to make new friends...she looks really sad and pathetic in this picture but i swear she's happy!!! she's just hot and likes to lay down next to the air conditioning vent haha...

*** just to prove to jamie that my dog is indeed happy and not miserable...

turning point:
i feel like my life is at a major junction...i know its been basically a year since we graduated college and i feel like i am finally at the ends of the transition into post grad life...although i miss college and realize life will never be as care free as those golden 4 years, i can't go back to it...every time im at rutgers, some rutgers event, or around undergrad kids, i just feel so annoyed...all the people seem so young and stupid...the things they say, how they act, how they make big deals out of things that they will realize don't mean anything the second they graduate...having attended the most recent china nite to support some friends, i made it the official last college related event i will ever go to...i love you rutgers, but the only reason i would ever go back is for a fat sandwich haha...

crossroads:
so i'm letting go of school...what's next? embracing work? i doubt it haha...not quite at the other end of the spectrum yet...i think i've hit this massive roadblock...i don't know what i want anymore...well paying job with a big firm? check...happy? not yet...i know there is so much more to life...marriage, kids, promotions etc...but everything is so mundane right now...work throughout the week...weekend comes and then what? all people want to do is go into the city and drink...that crap gets totally played out...sometimes i get totally scared because i don't know what i want to do anymore...

is there something wrong with me?:
i ask myself this all the time...i feel like all people want to do now that we are working and out of school, is go into the city and bar/club hop...it's fun on occasions like someone's birthday etc, but doing this every weekend is whack to me...every friday at work, my friends will ask me what i've got planned for the weekend and how i should come out to the city...these days i just kinda decline all the invites...no offense to work buds but i'm just not into that stuff as much as everyone else...

recently i just stopped caring about a lot of things...maybe it's for the better...i guess i came to the conclusion that i'm eli chang and i don't care about what john smith or jane doe is doing...sometimes i hear people make comments like "whoa <name> is the man, he drives a M3"...or "that guy <name> is rich and he parties it up with all these girls" etc...i used to say stuff like that too, but now it's straight super whack...he drives a nice car? who cares...he has money and gets with slutty girls? who cares...sometimes i'm with friends whom are having conversations like this and feel like they think there's something wrong with me...they talk about how hot so and so girl is, and i find myself sitting there not caring...i'm not going to talk about random girls on facebook or rutgers...i mean it's not like we know them or talk to them, hell chances are they suck anyway...whenever i make a comment like that everyone thinks i'm such a hater...maybe im not a hater but everyone needs to stop caring so much...

what i want:
i want good conversation...i crave it endlessly...it's hard to find somebody that you can have kick ass conversations with...no offense to my friends, but i guess some of them don't want to talk about the things i do...i want old school fun...no random bar/club in the city...i want friends on a lawn with some burgers on the grill with some 90s music...everyone just chilling out...i want to feel alive...i want to feel excited again...i want to have things to look forward to...i want to sit with my friends and vibe out without saying anything, and for everyone to feel totally chill...everyone to feel happy and have that feeling like we need nothing else at that exact moment...

*** maybe i'm just an oddball...maybe i'm boring...maybe i need to meet new people...all opinions/comments welcome...i hope i get some meaningful ones hahaha...

i haven't updated in a long time...i've been meaning to and often start writing only to either delete the entry or make it private...let the rambling begin:

work: work is something everyone always asks each other about..."hey <name> haven't seen you in awhile...how's work?" and then ppl either reply "eh work is work" in a defeated tone...or they wildly exclaim "i hate work, kill me" in a more jovial tone...i usually go with the first response ha...i know friends who are hesitant about finding a job or starting work...i really think that all jobs suck (minus the fantasy ones like video game tester and jessica alba sun tan lotion applicator)...i know some ppl who just dont search for jobs because they are looking for something they "love"...i think these people need to wake up...im not saying forget your dreams...but you can still chase dreams while being productive...i hate when people just sit on their asses expecting their dreams to come true...suck it up and take the bullet...be a tool from 9-5 and then a rockstar the rest of the day...maybe i just say this stuff because i feel defeated at work...i need some serious motivation/inspiration

health: one word...shitty haha...getting better though...this ties in to the whole work piece...sometimes after sitting on my ass in front of my computer screens...i just want to lay down as soon as i come home...as a result, basically all the progress i ever made going to the gym went to shit...give me 2 months, ill turn it around...running sucks...who the hell loves to run?! cheetahs...

friends: ah which friends truly pass the test of time...everyone thinks about this post grad...im lucky to say i work with some great people i now consider to be close friends...even if i bail on happy hour and weekend debauchery all the time haha...i think ive been moderately succesful in keeping up with my buds...although some have gone off to make new whack friends haha...meeting new people can be fun...i feel im such a harsh judge of character because i tend to dislike most people i meet haha...

love: nothing much going on here...some friends ask me for my opinion and advice on things...im always glad to help but its easy commenting on a situation rather than being in one...most of the time when im mid conversation telling people what i think about this or that...i find myself thinking just how hypocrtical i really am...i think i got too tied up in that whole "you'll know when it's right" type of bullshit...i can't just up and pursue a relationship...even if signs may be pointing to favorable outcomes...if an attractive member of the opposite sex is interested in you...are we supposed to proceed just because of the situation? i always thought no...im always searching for that sense of right...the sudden and immediate connection...the "real" click that makes you realize that "yes this person is right"...then again we all need to take risks...suck it up and take the first dive and maybe there will be something at the bottom...

remedies: listen to music folks...it can make any shitty day just a little less shitty haha...books...im trying to read more...i enjoy social commentary books...friends...talk to people...express yourself and let all the crap out...xbox live...shoot some monsters with friends...its a great way to keep in touch and its down right nerd-tastic fun...werd...

simone thanks for the hug...i got it from cyrus last night ha...